Talking (Lily)

I walk in front of the hidden entrance to the Room of Requirement three times, thinking the same thing, 'I need somewhere to talk to her, to explain'
After I walk past the entrance the third time a door appears. I step inside and there is a fire place, a small sofa and an armchair. I go and sit on the sofa, thinking over what I want to say as I wait. I know I need to apologize, but thats not enough, I need to explain why I said what I said, and my past.

If what I said means my chance with Lily is wrecked then I don't know what I'll do, just thinking about it brings me to tears. I let a few tears escape as I sit staring into the fireplace and wait.

I walked towards the door, just before i entered it i felt a powerful emotion, Sadness,guilt. coming from inside the room.
I knew it had to be liza, But if i was to forgive her, inside whenever i looked at her i would see her family.. my family.. I walked through the door and looked down at the floor as i sat beside her.

I know she's come into the room, and for a moment I don't say anything. I scrub my eyes with the back of my hand to stop any run away tears.
"Liliy I..."
I what? What can I say to explain why I did what I did or said what I said?
"I'm sorry,"
It's not enough, not nearly enough.

"I'm not going to try and make excuses for what I said on the train, because nothing can excuse it. It was callous and heartless, like me I guess, and I can't take it back, as much as I want to."

Better, but I'm still not explaining anything. I have to say more, but what. My mind is a
whirl of what I want to say.

"The thing is...well you probably know already...my family were Death Eaters, both my parents and my brother, and I was raised around that. I was brought up believing I was better than everyone because I had pure blood. My family, after they murdered yours, they told me that one day I'd have to do the same. I was raised to hate everything that wasn't pure and perfect."

I'm explaining I think, I just hope she's getting it.

"Then they died, or were murdered, and I was sent to live with my cousin Viktor. He was different and I started getting confused. His standards on everything were different."

Get to the point girl.

"On the train, I guess I was worried that by being me my parents would be ashamed of me, and Draco would hate me. But after I had the arguement with you I realised none of that mattered anymore, my parents are dead and I don't need people like Draco if they'll keep me from people that I care about, people like you."

Nearly there

"The thing is, I really like you. It goes against everything I was brought up on, but I don't care anymore. Because Lily, I feel more like me when I'm with you, then I do when I'm with me."

I fall silent, just hoping she'll understand.

I listened intently to her words, my mind was recalling loads of memories while my body took in her emotions,Making me ache and burn inside.
As i listened i was tryin to think of what i was going to say once she was finished, i started to panic and stared down at the floor.

As she finished her last sentence I turned my head to her, my red hair in my face covering my eyes.
"I understand....And i forgive you.." I say recalling everything she had just said and i rulydid forgive her.
even if the remark about my parents seemed unforgivable.

I gently brush the hair away from her eyes, her beautiful eyes and give a small smile, close to tears again.
"Thank you," I whisper as tears drop down my face, feeling relieved and happy and a weird feeling I don't recognise. I don't know why I'm crying, I guess its becasue she says she forgives me and I was so terrified that she wouldn't, that I'd lose her when I was just finding her...

I smiled weakly and wiped away the tears which fell fom her eyes.
I pulled her into a tight embrace.
"let just not mention that day ever." I whispered into her ear.

I hug her tightly, clinging to her, almost afraid that this is a dream and I'm going to wake up and she'll hate me. I'm actually shaking, I'm so scared she'll change her mind.
"Never again." I whisper, meaning I'll never mention the day again, and I'll never make the same mistake again.

pull back from her and smiled.
"Dont cry.. all has been forgiven.." i speak softly. and brushed back her hair.

I close my eyes as I listen to her voice, and I open them to see her smile. I smile back at her, a soft smile. If anyone in Slytherin saw me now they'd be ashamed, and the thought makes me give a dry chuckle. I look at Lily, admiring her. Wondering how she could like me.
"I'm just so scared, that this is a wonderful dream and any minute I'll wake up and you'll hate me,"

I smiled weakly.
"how could i hate a friend, and if i was to change my mind wouldnt i have done so?" I smiled an leaned back into the chair.
"Liza you've been so nice to me today that it makes up for all the other days."

"Okay," I say softly, trying not to let her realise how the word 'friend' sent a pang of pain shooting through me. Hearing it spoken to me from her hurt a lot, I guess I wanted to be more than her friend. I desperatly try to mask my emotions from her, but I'm not sure if it's possible or not.

I clutched hold of my chest feeling omething sting my heart, i turn to liza and knew it was coming from her, I closed my eyes and recalled my last sentence and knew what was bothering her.
"Liza.. " i leaned forwards and pressed my lips against hers.

I gasp slightly as I feel her kiss me, before relaxing into it. I guess I hadn't managed to hide my feelings, but I'm glad. I pull back for a moment, smiling widely but nervously.
"Lily...I know I asked earlier in the note and all, but I'd like to ask you properly," I say quietly, my heart racing as I take hold of Lily's hands and look her in the eyes.
"I well...Can I date you?" I ask, extremely nervous.

I smiled lightly and nodded.
"yes." i spoke softly.
I always did have an attraction to both male and female.but never really had a relationshp with a female..

I smile widely, leaning forward to give Lily a soft chaste kiss before I pull away again.
"Thank you," I say softly, happiness and the same strange feeling I felt earlier welling up inside.

"No problem." I licked my lips and smiled.
I then felt many emotions seeping off liza.

I grin self consiously, running a hand through my hair.
"So are we still on for Saturday then?" I ask, admiring the way Lily's eyes look and how her hair falls around her face.

I grinned widely and nodded.
"yeh! cant wait." I smiled crossed my legs upon the sofa.

I find myself relaxing and smiling, "Me too, I'm looking forward to it loads. It'll be great," I say with a sly grin. I'm going to spoil her rotten and enjoy every minute of it. Anything she wants is hers. I grin widely, she's worth it.

I smile and began o play with my hair.
"So...Liza.. whats your favourite colour?" i asked trying to perk up a conversation.

I smile, "Red, the deep velvety kind. What about you?" I ask, think how adorable she looks when she plays with her hair. The thought makes me giggle a little. Then I think of something else.
"And whats your favorite gemstone?"